A perspective on life

I got a call from my Dad tonight, which isn’t unusual, however he had bad news for me.

Starting a few years ago, he has had a few blackouts. Like 4 in 2 years, nothing major, but the last one included some blood. They discovered an esophageal ulcer, and after more testing, discovered cancer there too. Dad also survived a bout of prostate cancer about 6 years ago.

This of course got me to thinking (and some crying, but I won’t dwell on that) about life and it’s finite term. Don’t get me wrong, Dad’s cancer is NOT life threatening and I’m sure he’s going to be just fine. I’m not a fatalist.

Earlier this week, I had a chat with Chris about two close friends who died a long time ago. Tammy died a full 20 years ago, but mentioning her a few weeks ago during dinner brought me to tears and I felt I owed Chris some details about why it affected me so much that night. I also talked about another friend, Craig, who died. Both were taken from us way before their times. And there have been a few elderly and ill family members pass as well. All in all though, I’ve been spared a lot of “experience” dealing with death.

Chris and I are both healthy, the major exception being my diabetes, which is under control, so our mortality isn’t something I think about too often. Tonight’s call from my dad did bring up thoughts about our future together and what it will be like when health starts to become an issue for us. I can’t say that I’m looking forward to it, but I know that together, the two of us are strong of spirit and will persevere.

I’m going to be calling my dad back tomorrow. Something else I realized is that I haven’t said “I love you” to him in a long while. It’s implied, always, but I think it’s time I said it again.