The Jeff R Project

Failblog is full of fascinating examples of people doing dumb things. Whenever I’m feeling down, I visit the holy quint-ology of sites that make me smile.

1. I Can Has Cheezburger (aka LolCatz)
2. I Has A Hotdog
3. Engrish Funny
4. RoflRazzi
5. Fail Blog

While I don’t recall seeing this on their site, I did find it on YouTube in their channel and thought it was hysterical.

Given the recent news about Zac Efron trying to re-make the classic Kevin Bacon film Footloose (which is a treasured film for me and many others) you wonder if this isn’t why they’ve stopped for now. I know this isn’t Zac, he’s much cuter than this guy, and better dancer, but a remake of a classic film like Footloose could end up going just as badly as this video. Have a look…

While I have no doubt Footloose will get remade at some point, much to the disappointment of those of us who remember the original, and are forced to take our kids to see the remake, I would really hope it doesn’t go as badly as some other remakes.

In the meantime, it’s easy to laugh at this douche’s bad acting, bad dancing, and inevitable fail.

Chris brought this amusing little anectode to my attention. Vince Schlomi was arrested in Miami. Vince is the ShamWow guy for those of us who don’t recognize the name.

ShamWow Guy In Slap, Chop Bust – March 27, 2009

One of the most fascinating things is that the guy is 44! When you look at the info-mercials he looks like he’s around 30 at most. I mean, not handsome but youngish looking. Not so much in the mug shot posted on the Smoking Gun site.

Talk about a month of hard nights. Anyway, I wonder how quickly the good folks at ShamWow cancelled the current ad campaign.

A co-worker just reminded me about a long standing anti-movie “quirk” I have and I started wondering “What haven’t you done?” about other people. Please post your list/comments in the comments (duh).

So here’s my deal. There are (at least) 3 movies on my DO NOT SEE list. Yeah, yeah, there’s lots of movies I haven’t seen and probably wouldn’t see (3 of those start with the words “High School Musical“) but I’m talking about ones taht I have a nearly pathological aversion to.

Ok, maybe not that bad, but I decided long ago that I would never see them, and have since gone out of my way to maintain that stand, however irrational it may be.

1. E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial
2. Dirty Dancing
3. The Bodyguard

You can tell how long this has been going on. Even during my time working in video stores, video departments, managing theatres and now in this age of easy rentals and torrent downloads, I avoid those. Even if they’re free on TV.

My rationale? Simple – Just because everyone else saw them, does that mean I have to?

I’ve never bungy-jumped, tried surfing, sky-diving, group sex, mind-altering non-prescription drugs (not even pot) and never gotten so drunk I forgot the previous night. There’s more, but I’d like to hear your comments…

Thanks to Twitter and @Unmarketing for pointing out this appalling story.

Basically, a month after The huge anti-bullying rally across Canada which had thousands of people showing their support by wearing a pink shirt, we get this story.

Rob Scorcia was bullied for years and nothing ever really happened to the bully. Rob reported it to school authorities, police, parents etc and it just kept happening and escalating.

So one day Rob takes an imitation gun and threatens the guy with it. Which was dumb, but considering there was no real danger, and nothing happened beyond a verbal threat you would expect it to end there.

Instead, Rob was arrested and charged with using an imitation handgun in the commission of a robbery and now faces a year in jail for it. An automatic one year sentence. The jury in the trial didn’t believe or didn’t consider the fact that he’d been bullied for years.

It’s a mis-carriage of justice in my lay-opinion. Not that Rob was in the right, but that the bully has gotten away with years of this crap and then turns around and has Rob arrested because he finally stood up.

I’m sure there’s way more to this than I’ve read or inferred from one article, but I wanted to vent and share this with you.

The family is trying to raise money for an appeal.

And the bully?

In his second day at college this year, he got charged with sexual assault for pushing and fondling a female student and robbery after a male student was repeatedly kicked and spat on during a demand for his property.

My aunt just sent this to me. Sure it’s cliche and it’s been around the block a few times, but it’s also very hard to argue with.

MEN ARE JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE  

NICKNAMES  

• If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.  
• If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT

• When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.  
• When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY

• A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.  
• A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need but it’s on sale.

BATHROOMS

• A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel .  
• The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS

• A woman has the last word in any argument.  
• Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE

• A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.  
• A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS

• A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.  
• A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE

• A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.  
• A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does.

DRESSING UP

• A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.  
• A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL

• Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.  
• Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING

• Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.  
• A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A married man should forget his mistakes. There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing!

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